Chapter Nine: Cisco Disco

Chapter Nine: Cisco Disco is a blog post from The Chronicles of Cisco. It was released on May 11, 2015.

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Disco never died. Well, at least Cisco Disco never did. It all started on a rainy Tuesday night after band practice while I was in between studying for my AP Calc and AP Chemistry finals. Yeah, I'm a nerd, I get it, moving on. So, I'm real stressed out, like on the verge of running away, shaving my head, and getting loads of tattoos (JK I'm not down for needles) when the radio station started bouncing some serious disco. I heard the beautiful high-pitched call of Barry Gibb and did exactly what the dude told me to do – I danced. I boogied until my legs were so sore that I had to crawl to bed. The next morning in Calc, I rocked my test so hard all the while humming "You Should Be Dancing." Why this story? Let me explain.

This week was a bad one, dudes. The most stressful week of my entire life. Harrison Wells is on the run, Eddie is missing, and I almost got Jurassic Parked by a super-intelligent, telepathic gorilla. So basically, everything sucks down here in the Pipeline. I know what you're asking yourselves – could Donna Summer or the Bee Gees handle this kind of stress? Could Cisco Disco live on? Well, the answer to that is sorta...

Now, I know a metahuman disco is damn near impossible. Imagine this: Weather Wizard making eyes at Shawna from across a foggy room. Nah, man. Also, The Mist would probably be that fog, trying to kill everyone. Hard pass. But I could equip every cell with its own disco ball, turn down the lights, and turn up the KC and the Sunshine Band. "That's the way, uh-huh, uh-huh, I like it." Too bad no one wanted to dance. Especially not Shawna. I showed her my signature move through the glass, and she gave me the finger. Whatever, haters. It's not like I'm going home alone to dance by myself.

That's exactly what I did. Blasted my girl Gloria Gaynor singing "Well, now go! Walk out the door! Just turn around now, 'cause you're not welcome anymore. Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye? Did you think I'd crumble? Did you think I'd lay down and—" DING DONG.

I opened the door. It was Barry and Caitlin. He was holding a large pizza, and she clung to a six-pack of beer. Both were staring at me mouth open – could have been the John Travolta white disco suit I was rockin'. Caitlin said something, but I couldn't hear her over the music. Barry did his speed thing and suddenly the music was at normal levels. "What was that Caitlin," I asked – expecting her to make fun of me. She said, "You want to dance. 'Cause I can dance." It was on, a Cisco Disco dance party with my best friends. Sister Sledge said it best, "We are family. Get up everybody and sing."

The next morning, I was still stressed and everything still sucked, but at least I got some super buds to boogie oogie oogie with now. Things could be worse...

Until next time.

Cisco, OUT!